A mother's ramblings on her son's 2nd birthday
This past year with Ryan has been very rewarding and challenging for me as a mother.
Where I thought I had patience before, I have found myself having to dig deep for even more patience.
Where I thought I knew a lot about parenting, I learned that what works for one child, doesn't necessarily work with the next, and that was a very humbling feeling.
Where I experienced joy before, I have found even more joy seeing my second son smile for the first time, walk for the first time, and say "Mama, I wuv ooo!"
Where I have felt love before, I have found even more love watching Ryan interact with his brother - seeing them play, wrestle, and express love for each other.
When I see Ryan, and I see his feistiness, his spirit, his robust laugh, his spunkiness and love for life - I see Sean in him, but I also recognize that he is so much his own person at such a tender age of 2.
Ryan had a rough night last night - he didn't want to go to bed, he got up 5 or 6 times after I tucked him in. Then at 1am he cried for me - I put him back to sleep only to find him staring at me in my bedroom a few hours later in the dark. (It scared the crap out of me!) It was 3am, and I remembered in my groggy state that he was born at 3:07am 2 years ago. I picked him up and put him next to me in my bed - but that wasn't good enough, he wanted to lay on top of me, with his head tucked snugly on my shoulder. I thought to myself, maybe he just wants to be where he was 2 years ago - on his mom's tummy for the first time, feeling the warmth of his mom, the security of his parents.
Life with Ryan is always challenging, but every second with him is such a gift. It is his birthday - yet he is a gift to me. Who else could teach me all these things, but him? Ryan means "little king" and that is exactly what he is - a king, teaching me to see the world - his kingdom - in a whole different way.
Where I thought I had patience before, I have found myself having to dig deep for even more patience.
Where I thought I knew a lot about parenting, I learned that what works for one child, doesn't necessarily work with the next, and that was a very humbling feeling.
Where I experienced joy before, I have found even more joy seeing my second son smile for the first time, walk for the first time, and say "Mama, I wuv ooo!"
Where I have felt love before, I have found even more love watching Ryan interact with his brother - seeing them play, wrestle, and express love for each other.
When I see Ryan, and I see his feistiness, his spirit, his robust laugh, his spunkiness and love for life - I see Sean in him, but I also recognize that he is so much his own person at such a tender age of 2.
Ryan had a rough night last night - he didn't want to go to bed, he got up 5 or 6 times after I tucked him in. Then at 1am he cried for me - I put him back to sleep only to find him staring at me in my bedroom a few hours later in the dark. (It scared the crap out of me!) It was 3am, and I remembered in my groggy state that he was born at 3:07am 2 years ago. I picked him up and put him next to me in my bed - but that wasn't good enough, he wanted to lay on top of me, with his head tucked snugly on my shoulder. I thought to myself, maybe he just wants to be where he was 2 years ago - on his mom's tummy for the first time, feeling the warmth of his mom, the security of his parents.
Life with Ryan is always challenging, but every second with him is such a gift. It is his birthday - yet he is a gift to me. Who else could teach me all these things, but him? Ryan means "little king" and that is exactly what he is - a king, teaching me to see the world - his kingdom - in a whole different way.
posted by Rachel at
7:31 PM
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